procrastination.. is the mother of all evil.. actually it isnt.. i know what the mother is.. i think. procrastination is the baby. but it's freaking evil too.

i was putting some pepper into my food just now and taking the bottle cap off some soya sauce thing. and for some weird reason. i suddenly felt very.. normal. not that im saying i am abnormal. coz if u say u are abnormal u are seriously NOT! the word normal is.. warped actually. coz everyone is just like.. everyone. and we are human so we are all the same.. u know what i mean! blah but anyway that's not what i was trying to say.. i mean.. i suddenly felt so empowered! like.. I CAN TAKE OFF THE SOYA SAUCE BOTTLE TOP!!!! i just felt so normal. and i dunno man. am definitely crazy but it was a nice moment.

anyways saying that reminds me of something.. ("bae yong jun" just signed in. hurhurhur. honestly i just dont understand all the craze over this byj guy. everyone is dying over how good looking he is. but please. he looks like some ordinary uncle or something. i realise that if i say i cant stand someone it's just stupid coz i dont even know him personally. so i'll just say i dont understand the craze, but he may be a nice person for all it's worth.. anyway WHY THE HELL AM I TALKING ABOUT A BYJ!) yea ok.. some stuff which happened recently.. i honestly cannot remember what.. and reading a million little pieces.. i mean this is like a hardcore addict. but in some ways.. actually in a lot of ways u can identify with his feelings. EVEN THOUGH i am apparently allergic to alcohol (quite pathetic huh. im like such a dork! but i love being one!).. EVEN THOUGH i have never taken drugs.. and am never going to.. i know u can never say never.. but please! snorting cocaine! i rather eat shit. or maybe not. but yea.. the underlying emotions.. it's the same thing.. i dont know how to explain it.. coz everything he felt.. he unfortunately manifested it in alcohol and drugs.. which got him hooked and stuff.. but the underlying emotions are the same u know? and im sure everyone has got them.. but obviously in different ways.. it kinda depends on ur character.. and seriously.. intelligence.. i dont mean brain intelligence.. i kinda mean.. streetsmart-ness.. can i put it that way? and emotional intelligence.. i think it's so easy to let urself slide into something.. it's just a very thin line u have to cross and after that.. it's so different to return to the other side.. even stuff like u know.. homosexuality.. there's a very fine line between admiration of a person of the same sex and crossing over to developing feelings for someone. so well.. that's that. and it's quite sad la. i dunno.

whoa. apparently if bird flu crosses into singapore.. 1/4 of people will die. that's serious man. even though i sound like such a clueless jock somehow in reporting this news. but really. my language is too casual!!! no one will take me seriously! but like i give a ____. sigh. i dunno whether i should cut down on shit. i mean it's like so nothing! but yet it peppers my speech so much it sounds horribly just.. awful to me. argh.

i realised one of my terrible points is how much.. i insult people. no, not the behind the back this person sucks shit and stuff.. coz im not a freaking retard. but i mean.. how i casually just say this person sucks and blah.. like people in the limelight.. coz i really cant take all this.. stupid fakeness. but i dont know them personally so i realise i should just shut my gap. it's not that i think im any greater. i mean i could be the biggest crap of all. but im just saying.. i shall try to.. think before i speak and just give people more respect.. whether they deserve it or not is none of my business.

o man. i sound so terrible. but im quite a nice person i think. really.. but noooooo!! but yesssssssssss.

i hate the things i write i dont know why.. hahahaaa! im nuts. bye.