this title shit is pissing me off

you know someone who appears charismatic...
somehow has these special qualities..
and although there are negative attributes as well
you somehow overlook them
coz they dont really show themselves usually
or to other more unfamiliar people
makes one think that person is something special.. different

even if person does screws up.
over and over again.
somehow you think person can still make a name for him/herself
not susceptible to all this shit that mere mortals fall victim to
because person has the ability, charm.. street smarts needed to thrive
these are more valuable than all other more 'down to earth' qualities.
are they not.

but there comes a day...
when you realise that that really might not be the case..
and that charisma kinda turns into some disillusionment.
pure disillusion.
and you question yourself. whether your judgment now is right.
whether it can stand as a worthy competitor to those street smarts
but really when such selfishness appears coupled with pure idealism...
there really is not much competition between the two anymore.
especially when it concerns the wellbeing of others.

now what's left behind is a great deal of disappointment.
but probably... more anxiousness
but i guess... everyone has to learn their own lessons.

i might be wrong.
and i really hope i am.